I have a boyfriend. [Guy] I have a pet goldfish. [Girl] What? [Guy] I thought we were talking about things that didn't matter.
Take a screw with you and put it in your pocket. Then, when a girl comes up to you, offer her the screw and say, "Wanna screw?"
Congratulations! You've been voted "Most Beautiful Girl In This Room" and the grand prize is a night with me!
Excuse me, I don't want you to think I'm ridiculous or anything, but you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I just felt like I had to tell you.
(Ask a person for the time) 9:15? So today is May 1, 2008, at 9:15 PM, thanks I just wanted to be able to remember the exact moment that I met the woman of my dreams.
Excuse me, I'd like to have kids someday, and I wanted to know how your parents created such a beautiful creature.